Irish Wedding Traditions

The wedding ceremony in modern western traditions tends to have more in common from one nation to another than there are differences.

Even most of the prevalent customs such as the bride's white dress, rings, wedding cake, flowers and attendants as well as the feast and pranks played on the couple as they make their final exit are pretty much universal.

But where did these customs and traditions come from?

Every one knows a bride wears a veil, but do you know why?

Where did the tradition come from of carrying the bride over the threshold? And why do brides carry flowers?

Here we have some of the more common wedding traditions - where they came from and how they started.

Many of the traditions have several explanations but these are the most common.

Some date back many hundreds of years so their origins are not fully known but most have their roots in ancient superstitious or pagan beliefs.

Irish Superstitions

In the 18th and 19th centuries, the Irish believed that if the sun shone on the bride, it would bring good luck to the couple.

It was also lucky to hear a cuckoo on the wedding morning or to see three magpies.

After the wedding ceremony, it was important that a man and not a woman be the first to wish joy to the new bride.

Some other Irish superstitions and customs are:

It's good luck to have your birthstone in your engagement ring, even if that stone is otherwise thought to be an unlucky gem.

The earrings you wear on your wedding day will bring you luck & happiness ever after.

It's lucky to tear your wedding dress accidentally on your wedding day.

It's good luck if a happily married woman puts the veil on you, but bad luck to put it on yourself.

It's lucky to be awakened by birds singing on your wedding morning.

If you look at the sun when you leave for your wedding, your children will be beautiful.

Selecting the Date

In Ireland the last day of the old year is thought specially lucky for weddings. Childermas Day or Holy Innocents is, on the contrary, a very unlucky one.

An old superstition holds that May is an unlucky wedding month, because of its association with the Virgin Mary, yet it is one of the most popular months for weddings, both in America and Ireland.

A sunny day is lucky, and a rainy one, unlucky. Christmas & New Year's Eve are lucky times to get married.

You Marry on Monday for wealth, Tuesday for health, Wednesday the best day of all, Thursday for crosses, Friday for losses and Saturday no day at all.

Throwing the Bouquet

The custom of the bride tossing the bouquet to the unmarried guests dates from the 14th century and probably originated in France.

The woman who catches the flowers is supposedly the next to marry.

The same is supposedly true when the bride tosses her garter to the unmarried men.

Something old, new, borrowed and blue

The full wording of this popular bridal attire rhyme, which dates back to the Victorian times is 'something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue and a silver sixpence in your shoe'.

Something old refers to wearing something that represents a link with the bride's family and her old life.

Usually, the bride wears a piece of family jewelry or maybe her mother's or grandmother's wedding dress.

Wearing something new represents good fortune and success in the bride's new life.

The bride's wedding dress is usually chosen, if purchased new, but it can be any other new item of the bride's wedding attire.

Wearing something borrowed, which has already been worn by a happy bride at her wedding, is meant to bring good luck to the marriage.

Something borrowed could be an item of bridal clothing, a handkerchief or an item of jewellery.

Wearing something blue dates back to biblical times when the colour blue was considered to represent purity and fidelity.

Over time this has evolved from wearing blue clothing to wearing a blue band around the bottom of the bride's dress and to modern times where the bride wears a blue or blue-trimmed garter.

Honking Horns

Another ancient practice in some parts of Ireland is that of firing rifles and other weaponry into the air as the couple pass to salute the bride; of course over the past centuries this has occasionally been observed with devastating results.

Honking the horns of the cars in the procession from the church replaces the firing of guns.

Carrying the Bride over the Threshold

There seems to be two explanations for this tradition where the groom carries his bride over the threshold when entering their home as a married couple for the first time.

The first is to protect the bride from evil spirits that were thought to be lying in wait under the threshold.

The second explanation relates to Roman times when it was believed that if the bride stumbled when entering the newlywed's home for the first time, it would bring bad luck and harm to their marriage.

So carrying the bride across the threshold would prevent this from happening, though no reference can be found of what happens if the groom stumbles or falls while carrying the bride.

And a silver sixpence in your shoe

Placing a silver sixpence in the bride's left shoe is a symbol of wealth. This is not just to bring the bride financial wealth but also a wealth of happiness and joy throughout her married life.

In the past, an Irish 5 pence coin could be worn in place of the sixpence in the shoe.

Wedding Gowns

The bride's white gown has become so traditional that many cannot imagine anything else but this is relatively recent development in the Celtic lands.

Anne of Brittany made the white wedding dress popular in 1499. In the 19th century colored bridal dresses were quite common at country weddings.

Before that, a woman just wore her best dress. In biblical days, blue (not white) represented purity (as mentioned above), and the bride and groom would wear a blue band around the bottom of their wedding attire.

The Wedding Veil

The origin of the wedding veil is unclear but it is thought that it predates the wedding dress by centuries.

One tradition comes from the days when a groom would throw a blanket over the head of the woman of his choice when he captured her and carted her off.

Another is that during the times of arranged marriages, the bride's face was covered until the groom was committed to her at the ceremony so he could not refuse to marry her if he didn't like her looks.

Therefore, the father of the bride gave the bride away to the groom, who then lifted the veil to see her for the first time.

It is also thought that the veil was worn to protect the bride from evil spirits that would be floating around on her wedding day.

These various origins have all evolved into the tradition that the veil covers the bride's face throughout the ceremony until the minister pronounces the couple man and wife and the groom then lifts the veil to kiss his new wife.

Third finger, left hand

A bride's engagement ring and wedding ring are traditionally worn on the third finger of the left hand. Although the origin of this tradition can not be precisely pinpointed there are two strongly held beliefs.

The first, dates back to the 17th century where during a Christian wedding the priest arrived at the forth finger (counting the thumb) after touching the three fingers on the left hand '...in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost'.

The second belief, referring to an Egyptian belief that the ring finger follows the vena amoris, the vein of love that runs directly to the heart, means that wearing the rings on this finger is closest to the heart.

Leaving the Wedding

In centuries past, an Irish bride returned home by a different path with her new husband than she took to the church or wedding with her father.

This may have begun as an attempt to avoid pranks (which often involved kidnapping), but also symbolizes that she travels a new road in life as well.

Banns

Banns of marriage were required in areas under British rule, including Wales, Scotland and Ireland. The banns consisted of an announcement in church for three Sundays prior to the wedding.

This prevented people from marrying in haste and also gave any who might object time to learn of the match.

Giving three months notice to the registrar is still a legal requirement in Ireland.

Why the Bride stands on the left

During the marriage ceremony, the bride stands on the left and the groom on the right.

The first marriages were by capture, i.e., the groom would kidnap the woman, and take her away from her tribe with the help of a warrior friend, his best man, who would help him fight off other men who wanted this woman, and also help him prevent her family from finding them.

The groom would put himself and his bride into hiding, the honeymoon, and by the time the bride's family found them, the bride would already be pregnant.

When the groom fought off other warriors who also wanted his bride, he would hold onto her with his left hand, while fighting them off with his sword in his right hand.

Bridesmaids, Best Man

The bridal party has many origins, one of which comes from the Anglo Saxon days. When the groom was about to capture his bride, he needed the help of his friends, the "bridesmen" or "brideknights."

They would make sure the bride got to the church and to the groom's house afterwards. The bride also had women to help her, the "bridesmaids" or "brideswomen."

Handfasting

In some places and times it seems to mean betrothal and in others genuine marriage. Many interpret it as a trial marriage or a step beyond betrothal but not nearly as permanent as marriage.

It is often repeated that this handfasting for a year and a day would normally lead to regular permanent and valid marriage but if either parties chose to leave, the relationship was null.

Even if children had been brought forth these children were considered lawful offspring of both parents.

Handfasting, it is claimed is a holdover from pre-Christian Celtic marriage laws.

Today handfasting is now the familiar part of the ceremony where the person officiating the ceremony asks "Who gives this woman to be wed?" and then takes her hand from her father or whoever is giving away the bride and clasps it to the hand of the groom.

In olden days the priest or minister would wrap the clasped hands in the end of his stole to symbolize the trinity of marriage; man and woman joined by God. With God's grace in time another trinity would be manifest; mother, father and child.

The Celts have always been good at seeing things in threes.

This symbolic binding together in marriage evolved into a the practice of wrapping the clasped hands with a cord or an embroidered cloth, usually made especially for that purpose.

First on the Dance Floor

At the evening celebrations, the bride and groom traditionally dance first on their own to a waltz. However, as ballroom dancing is not so popular these days, the newlyweds usually dance to a favourite romantic song.

During the playing of this song, it is traditional for the groom to dance with his new mother-in-law and then with his mother, while the bride dances with her new father-in-law and then with her father.

The best man also joins in dancing with the chief bridesmaid and the ushers with the other bridesmaids when the bride and groom first change.

After the first dance, all the guests are invited to join the newlyweds on the dance floor.

Leap Year Proposal

The right of every women to propose on 29th February each leap year, goes back many hundreds of years to when the leap year day had no recognition in English law (the day was 'lept over' and ignored, hence the term 'leap year').

It was considered, therefore, that as the day had no legal status, it was reasonable to assume that traditions also had no status.

Consequently, women who were concerned about being 'left on the shelf' took advantage of this anomaly and proposed to the man they wished to marry.

It was also thought that since the leap year day corrected the discrepancy between the calendar year of 365 days and the time taken for the Earth to complete one orbit of the sun (365 days and 6 hours), it was an opportunity for women to correct a tradition that was one-sided and unjust.

Throwing the Rice or Confetti

The origin of throwing confetti over newlyweds predated Christ since it originates from the ancient Pagan rite of showering the happy couple with grain to wish upon them a 'fruitful' union.

Pagans believed that the fertility of the seeds would be transferred to the couple on whom they fell. The throwing of rice has the same symbolic meaning.

The word confetti has the same root as the word 'confectionery' in Italian and was used to describe 'sweetmeats' that is, grain and nuts coated in sugar that were thrown over newly weds for the same Pagan reason.

In recent years, small pieces of coloured paper have replaced sweetmeats, grain and nuts as an inexpensive substitute but the use of the word confetti has remained.

Despite the longevity of this tradition, it is on the verge of extinction because many register offices and churches no longer allow it because of the mess.

Wedding Venues

Bantry House and Garden

We are able to provide stylish and sophisticated wedding celebrations.

We cater for a max. of 90 guests in the Library/ Dining Room in the Winter months.

We provide a marquee in the Courtyard in the Summer months, catering for 100+ guests.

Services of our wedding co-ordinator are also available.

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Portmarnock Hotel and Golf Links
Portmarnock

Since 1907 and the marriage of the Jameson and Haig families, The Portmarnock Hotel and Golf Links has been the venue for many wedding celebrations.

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The Hamlet Court
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This is the ultimate wedding venue as a family run business and Proud Winner of Weddings Irish Style's "Best Irish Wedding Venue."

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Cabra Castle
Kingscourt

Wedding Packages:

Attractive Function Suites (catering for up to 350).

Red Carpet welcome including traditional Bag Piper to greet you on your arrival at the Castle and pipe you into the reception.

Wide choice of menus to suit your particular needs (including vegetarian options).

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Lough Rynn Castle Hotel
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Lough Rynn Castle offers a stunning backdrop for your wedding day.

The romantic setting and breathtaking views are matched by creative menus and impeccable service. This will truly be the wedding day you have dreamed of.

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Hayfield Manor Hotel
Cork City

At Hayfield Manor Hotel, our aim is to make your Wedding Day the most perfect and enjoyable day of your life.

No task is too large nor detail too small for our experienced staff.

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Ballynahinch Castle
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Ballynahinch is an idyllic setting for your wedding situated on a 450 acre estate the hotel and its historic building offers a truly magical location to your wedding day.

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Absolute Hotel
Limerick City

Weddings at the Absolute Hotel & Spa, Limerick, are weddings with a difference.

The combination of deign-forward surroundings, excellent ballroom and banqueting facilities, central location and amazing value for money will appeal to any style-conscious couple.

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Downhill House
Ballina

Set within a haven of landscaped gardens and private grounds, on the banks of the Brosna River and waterfalls, a tributary of the famous River Moy, the Downhill House Hotel is celebrating 75 years in business in 2010.

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Newgrange Hotel
Navan

The Newgrange Hotel offers brides-to-be one of the finest wedding venues in Meath, Ireland, helping you plan your special day from start to finish.

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Citywest Hotel and Golf Resort
Saggart

A Red Carpet welcome, champagne on arrival for the Bride & Groom, along with complimentary accommodation in the wedding suite, are all just part of making your big day that extra bit special.

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Killerig Resort Hotel
Killerig

Our team of professionals pride themselves on their reputation and expertise in hosting wedding receptions and civil ceremonies.

 At Killerig Resort Hotel Carlow we want to make it unforgettable with a first class service from start to finish helping you plan every aspect of your day.

Lord Bagenal Hotel
Leighlinbridge

Romantically situated in the peaceful countryside of Leighlinbridge County Carlow. Just 7 miles from Carlow town and 14 miles from Kilkenny on the banks of the River Barrow.

Offering all the comforts of more traditional 4 star wedding venues, the difference is we only cater to one wedding on any given day.

Ballinacurra House
Kinsale

Make your dreams come true and enter a world of elegance by holding your wedding of a lifetime at our unique wedding venue.

 With our creative hands-on approach and event management background, we will make your romantic luxury destination wedding an unforgettable experience.

Blarney Woolen Mills Hotel
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From the moment you walk through our doors you will experience a warm welcome and level of hospitality which you would expect on your wedding day.

Castle Hotel and Leisure Centre
Macroom

Our local, intimate and luxurious wedding hotel is just the place to celebrate in luxury and in style. The tranquil setting and beautiful scenery surrounding The Castle Hotel offer the perfect backdrop for your Macroom wedding.

The Maryborough Hotel
Douglas

Heralded as one of the most romantic hotels for weddings in Cork, the Maryborough Hotel & Spa is a magical location for celebrating one of the most important days of your life.

Every detail of your Maryborough wedding will be considered and every expectation exceeded with the renowned service and iconic elegance for which the hotel has long been known.

Midleton Park Hotel

With over 21 years experience and having hosted hundreds of weddings, The Midleton Park Hotel is the ideal wedding venue.

Our experienced and professional staff will help you to plan every step of that special occasion.

Choose from the Jameson Suite which can cater for up to 270 guests or The Garden Suite catering for up to 60 guests. Both suites overlook our landscaped gardens.

Radisson Blu Hotel & Spa
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With a wealth of experience and a reputation for style and elegance Radisson Blu Hotel & Spa, Galway is the perfect wedding venue for larger weddings and smaller more intimate affairs

We invite you to share your special day with us. With one wedding a day, our focus is you.

Ballyroe Heights Hotel
Tralee

Enjoy serene tunes from our house pianist upon arrival while we provide a complimentary drinks reception to you and your guests. Our unique centerpieces and table arrangements are provided for all weddings.

We have specially designed wedding packages all year round and we have all inclusive packages to meet your needs. Enjoy the atmosphere of Ballyroe where fun is brought into your celebrations throughout the day.

Killarney Avenue Hotel
Killarney

When it comes to creating memories that last a lifetime the Killarney Avenue Hotel is truly extraordinary.

From start to finish we can accommodate and enhance every aspect of your gathering. Our accomplished team work with you to ensure your event reflects your hopes and dreams.

Muckross Park Hotel
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From a lavish Wedding Reception to an intimate candlelit dinner, Muckross Park Hotel can offer a truly unique and memorable experience. All our function rooms are opulently decorated to make your occasion feel even more special.

Castle Oaks
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The Castleoaks House, one of the most sought after Limerick hotels, is the perfect hotel in Limerick for your weddings in Limerick.

The River Shannon with its wild swans, our mature gardens and romantic woodland walks provide an ideal backdrop for your Limerick Wedding making iit one of the best wedding hotels in Limerick.

Downhill House
Ballina

Set within a haven of landscaped gardens and private grounds, on the banks of the Brosna River & waterfalls, a tributary of the famous River Moy, the Downhill House Hotel is celebrating 75 years in business in 2010.